Here is what I am learning:
At the end of the day I come home and either
a) want to write, read, and edit until 2am (80% of the time).
b) want to exercise (10% of the time if it’s not already a dojo night).
c) or feel that my house is too big and my self is too small and there is all this space to fill and nobody to share it with (the other 10% of the time).
The thought of meeting somebody new or going on a date either
a) sounds like way too much work (49% of the time).
b) seems like an impossibility given where I live (49%).
c) or sounds kinda cool if there was mutual attraction (2%).
The degree to which I may be deceiving myself about this: Undetermined.
The thought of turning 30 in a few months either
a) makes me feel even more excited about working towards being self-employed (50% of the time)
b) or makes me think that if I want to meet somebody, I’d better do it soon and I’m going to have to move in order to do it (the other half of the time).
THE PROBLEM WITH THIS IS: If I want to be self-employed as soon as possible, I can really only afford to do that here, where my cost of living is incredibly low. If I want to meet somebody and that requires moving, I’ll be putting off my desires to be self-employed for at least a few more years.
Number of times in any given day I think about whether or not I will be alone for the rest of my life: 5-20.
Number of times I think about this while practicing karate: 0.
Number of times I think about this while writing a story: 0.
Number of times I think about this while preparing submissions for publication: 0.
(And people wonder why I get so much done…It’s called productive avoidance and it feels effing great. Try it. I swear. It’s better than party drugs.)
Other random facts:
Number of female friends last week who confided to me, on separate occasions, that they hadn’t had sex in 3-12 months because there are no men in our mountains: 5.
Number of potential dates I could think of for these women: 0.
Choice quote from one of these women: “I’m putting an add on Craig’s list saying I’ll pay $20 per inch.”
Number of women who laughed at said quote: Every woman in the coffeehouse at the time.