DAY 4/10 The Anti-List Lists
The Anti-List Lists : Here’s what an oddball week looks like, with my child still home on winter break but my business up and running. Work gets done during naps, which do still happen but aren’t consistent in terms of length. Cooking, cleaning, household management gets done with R in tow (or together, increasingly, which is great because “I’m a helper, Mommy, I get the job done…”) but I confess it makes me long for the extended light and lightness of summertime, when naps are “mom’s time” and daytime is play time.
An oddball week like this also means no writing. But soon enough I’ll take a deep dive into my next book (I have a retreat next week) so these lists are about to get oddball in the extreme opposite sort of way…Meantime…
…in business, there’s an arc to a week because I insist on NOT working after dinner, never working on weekends, and never overworking. The good thing about having worked myself to the point of sickness (no exaggeration) in my twenties, and then having invented my way into a corner running my own business in my thirties, is that in my forties I know DAMN WELL I’ll never do either of those things again. In fact, nearly ZERO ENERGY has to go into fending off those risks because I learned the lessons deeply enough to never forget.
So what remains to be learned? SO MUCH. Like peeing when I have to pee (this is a small act, but not peeing is a denial of self, honestly, and aggression starts in the body and grows outward into the world). Like doing less so I can feel more. Like resting (instead of always reading, always cooking, always listening, always SOMETHING even in the midst of a glass of wine or long car ride).
Also, learning that lists DO HELP and feel good to me, but that they are never the be-all-end-all. They’re a tool. Like all tools, they’re useful until they’re not. Hammer the nail too many times, and you damage the wood.